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"Christ on a fucking bike! I haven't heard a weak ass story like this since my ex-wife told me she wanted to spend a week at Brighton with her sister, just so she could instead go bang her new loverboy instead! Look you bullshitting wanker, I may look fat and stupid but my bosses gave me this job to help your soddin' arse! My mates over at MI:6 say you're tops, a real bollocking dick swinging genius, and we owe you ... especially for the warning that Hadji knew that a Royal was visiting that Guards base in Afghanistan, not to mention the help you gave our Ghurka units those two times. In short, you limp knob-ended colonial, my bosses think you deserve Class A support so I'm under very specific orders to be useful to you. So, with that out of the way, I don't frankly care if you're on vacation trying to hunt up some old bird you once banged, or if you're on Company business trying to trace a lead on a smuggling group. Bollocks to that, I just don't care mate! Just tell me what you'd. Soooo." And Ashley said, "like you don't gotta worrybout that. We have a connect with someone on the football team. I willintroduce you to him at Jake and Kyle's co-captains party tomorrownight!" I was like "omigawd, like that is totes awesome cuz like I haveto go to the salon tomorrow so like I will look like totes amazeballs forthe party! Teehee hee!"Entering the school, I walked past Tommy, Mandi, and the rest of my nowformer crew, only offering like a nervous smile. With my pretty iPhone 6SPlus, that daddy had gotten specially painted a glittery pink a coupledays ago in hand, I received a noise alerting me to a text from Mandithat read, "I was a cheerleader once too. Don't worry about how we feel,we understand your new rules... xoxoxo."That was a relief because I didn't want anyone to like be angry at me! Wewalked to our lockers, which were in the same block of lockers, like allfierce and stuff. We like knew we were all hawt and stuff.Becca said that like jocks will like want you.
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